PAGE 118// READ RIGHT TO LEFT

posted August 14th, 2012, 5:01 pm


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view Soen Kai's profile

August 14th, 2012, 5:10 pm

Soen Kai

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(#OxO#) I'm not sure wether the last sentence is right that way. Please correct me if necessary (ówo)

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April 30th, 2017, 5:33 pm

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view Redfaerie's profile

August 14th, 2012, 5:27 pm

Redfaerie

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The last comment works the way you have it, but it might sound better if you phrased it: "But you should at least stay through the winter." or "But you should stay through the winter at least"

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view melimoo's profile

August 14th, 2012, 5:28 pm

melimoo

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Cute page! I think the last sentence is okay as is... "at least" is tricky, even for a native speaker @_____@. Redfaerie's suggestions are good, too.

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view AlkseeyaKC's profile

August 14th, 2012, 5:30 pm

AlkseeyaKC

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Oh all the things that are going to happen. XD

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view chikao's profile

August 14th, 2012, 6:58 pm

chikao

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It's correct if you put a comma right in between it so it reads, "But you should stay, at lest through the winter" It's a little awkward with that pause though, I'm sure if you leave it no one, unless they're a grammar whore, would mind.

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view creativedemi64's profile

August 14th, 2012, 7:24 pm

creativedemi64

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You have a beautiful art style. I wasn't sure about the story at first but now I'm grabbed. Can't wait for more posts.

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view AlexandraSwiss's profile

August 14th, 2012, 8:17 pm

AlexandraSwiss

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I love the positions they're in at the fourth panel. It's so natural. Poor Kae! Stay! Stay!

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view Tsukimoto Myobi's profile

August 14th, 2012, 9:03 pm

Tsukimoto Myobi

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*contained squeel* Yes! A nice, safe place for sweet little Kae. Oh, please say yes! /*w*\

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view JayRayne's profile

August 14th, 2012, 11:54 pm

JayRayne

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*totally squeeled like a fangirl* this page is just too cute. Please stay!

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view ShinkuNoAme's profile

August 15th, 2012, 2:04 am

ShinkuNoAme

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Or 'you should stay... at least through the winter' Other that that, the comments above are good suggestions, especially the first.
Also, the last page- Dez's expression when he's peeking through his fingers, it makes me die of a cute attack. :3

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August 15th, 2012, 2:52 am

SmexyMuffin

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YES. stay. stay. stay. I absolutely adore these two!! And I love the story so far. Looking forward to more ~

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August 15th, 2012, 3:11 am

Ral (Guest)

Grammar~

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"But you should at least stay through the winter" would be a better way to put it. ^w^

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view crazylupus's profile

August 15th, 2012, 5:21 am

crazylupus

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it's like a little proposal XD

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view redleaveshavefallen's profile

August 15th, 2012, 8:14 am

redleaveshavefallen

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I just adore how neat and professional your pages look. ;u; And yay plot! I can't wait to see the reaction.

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view Anelir-Sensei's profile

August 15th, 2012, 8:50 am

Anelir-Sensei

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Yes, the last one makes sense. I believe you are getting better in your grammar, not that you were terrible to begin with. XD ^^ -is an editor-

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August 15th, 2012, 10:29 am

demon69

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Awe they are so cute!! X3

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view MissNox's profile

August 15th, 2012, 12:36 pm

MissNox

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D'aww! They're going to be living together! I am really enjoying this and the art is always beautiful! <3

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August 15th, 2012, 1:01 pm

Stephi

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The sentence seems fine. Prehaps " At least during the winter" would be better. The one you used is understandable.
On another note...Yay, new page!

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view kuroi_hitsuji's profile

August 15th, 2012, 1:33 pm

kuroi_hitsuji

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It depends on what you wanna put emphasis on.

Saying it "But you should at least stay through the winter" it gives an implication that he's giving a sort of pleading tone.

Kinda like "But you should AT LEAST stay through the winter :\"

but if you say "But you should stay through the winter at least" it's like..

"But you should stay through the winter AT LEAST <_<;"

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August 15th, 2012, 2:10 pm

Tty

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sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet ^____________^ all winterrrrrr....mmmm

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August 15th, 2012, 4:39 pm

Poseidonsmate

it's fine

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you really don't have to change it, since it's dialogue. Many of the suggestions are correct. For the purpose of conversation, all you need to make it read better is a comma.
"But you should stay, at least through the winter."
The comma separates the clause from the main sentence.

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August 16th, 2012, 12:04 am

KruegerKiss (Guest)

Uhh

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I, personally, am more caught up on the "Not just like that" part of this page. I have a very small inkling of what I think you meant to say...

The "at least" sentence has already been touched on enough, soooo, yeah....

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August 16th, 2012, 1:57 am

nani (Guest)

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"Should at least, stay through the winter

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view Faery Goddyss's profile

August 17th, 2012, 12:14 pm

Faery Goddyss

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Good idea!

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view EternalNyappy's profile

August 18th, 2012, 8:29 am

EternalNyappy

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Dez's hair..I frigging love it in every page, I wanna touch it *poking the screen* <3 Gosh, you describe their feelings so well, I love their expressions, and...you're just so amazing!! Definitely my favourite comic I'm following <3

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view Riskae's profile

August 19th, 2012, 8:28 pm

Riskae

Grammarz

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Others have told you about how you could change the sentence, but really it doesn't matter. It's dialogue and thus doesn't have to be totally correct (though the comma would help clarify a bit). The most important thing is flow don't worry too much about the specifics.

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view kabutoottonin's profile

August 22nd, 2012, 10:03 am

kabutoottonin

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could be me, but I can think of better moments to discuss this then when a sick person is wearing absolutely nothing...

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